In Awe of Life

Forgive me if I am all over the place in my thoughts. Working with 3 year olds does that....plus, my brain is fried, lol.

I have been helping with VBS this week. I have a sweet group of 9 three year olds. I wouldn't trade this time to love on them for most anything in the world. They show me what true love feels like and looks like. They make me understand why God tells us to be like children when we come before Him. They are so gentle and honest. As well as so sweet and in awe of the world.

That is not the only thing God has been showing me this week though.....

About 6 months ago, an Eagle scout that I knew committed suicide. He was my age. It was during a difficult time in my family's life and I am afraid I felt somewhat overlooked in my grief with it all. I attended the funeral and life went on. About a month after his death, I visited his temporary resting place. Today, I visited his permanent resting place. It was a time of closure. I don't feel sad so much because I miss him, but because of a life lost at such a young age. Only God should have the authority to give life and only God should take it away.

About a month after his funeral, I bought a ring that simply said "live." For me, it represented what I have survived; what God has helped me overcome, and how each of us must make a choice not to just merely exist, but to LIVE!  That ring has not been taken off since the day I got it other than to clean it. Today, I removed the ring and put it on my friend's grave. It just felt right. I want another ring, but this time not to remind me to live. I do not think I will ever forget that. I want a ring to remind me to hold on to hope, faith, and courage. Life is a journey, not a destination. It is a close of a chapter and a beginning of another exciting one.

 On a different note, it is really cool how God works. I think sometimes He brings people into my life simply to overwhelm me with His love by letting Him love on me through them. This person I've been hanging around with lately is definitely one of those people. I never feel like I can't be completely honest with this person. I can share whatever is on my mind, no matter how totally out there, silly, insignificant, or blunt it may be, and they just take it in stride. They treat me like a princess. It makes me want to cry sometimes because I feel like I am not worthy of any of it. I am nothing special, nor do I deserve any special treatment, but I can't help but think that if this is a fraction of the way God sees me, that I must be so special and valuable in His eyes. They kill me with kindness and I cannot help but be in awe of it. It makes me just want to praise God and say: "Who am I that you would care to know my name; that you would care to know that I even exist?" How great a God we serve!

And that is my random post of the day.........